Sensitive Topics, Simple Solutions: Building Hygiene & Body Awareness with Care
Sensitive Topics, Simple Solutions: Building Hygiene & Body Awareness with Care
“He often touches himself because he feels itchy. We were worried it would become a habit, but it seems more like discomfort than anything else.”
— Parent, Online Counselling Session
These reflections are drawn from my AI assistant’s notes, which help me capture subtle but important parenting moments — the ones that often lead to the most meaningful shifts.
The Parent’s Concern
The parent shared that their child frequently touched himself, especially during the day, which led to feelings of worry and uncertainty. On closer exploration, we found this wasn’t behavioural in origin — it was a response to physical discomfort caused by irritation and hygiene issues.
This is a common but often unspoken scenario in many families. Behaviours like these can easily be misunderstood, leading to unnecessary anxiety, shaming, or overcorrection. But the real solution lies in understanding the child’s body cues.
Our Approach
We focused on two things:
Here’s what we introduced:
- Salt water washing to soothe the area and reduce itchiness.
- Changing underwear twice a day, especially around pee times. Many children pee in a hurry to return to their activity, which can lead to dampness and irritation.
- Keeping a small, discreet stash of extra underwear so the parent can offer a change quickly without fuss.
- Redirecting the child gently toward sand or bead pillows, soft toys, or cosy blankets to satisfy sensory needs without reinforcing the touching behaviour.
Within a short time, the child’s discomfort reduced noticeably, and the behaviour decreased without confrontation or shame.
No Shame, Only Awareness
It’s important to remember that these behaviours are often phases. If handled with calmness and practical care, they pass naturally. But when parents attach shame, anxiety, or excessive focus, it can lead to fixation.
If a child is touching themselves only when no one is looking, it’s often a sign that they’ve internalised shame. This can inadvertently make the behaviour more secretive and emotionally charged.
The key is:
- Never scold or shame.
- Address the physical discomfort first.
- Offer clear, calm alternatives for comfort.
- Maintain a matter-of-fact tone that communicates “This is normal, and here’s what we do.”
This balanced response prevents emotional fixation and supports healthy body awareness — crucial as the child interacts with outside environments where such behaviours can be misunderstood.
Building Body Privacy & Protection
Alongside hygiene routines, it’s important to teach privacy and body protection in a gentle, age-appropriate way:
- Encourage the child to use the toilet privately, with doors closed.
- When parents need to support the child, they should always do so inside the toilet with closed doors, reinforcing that private care happens in private spaces.
- Changing clothes should also be done privately, helping the child internalise these boundaries early.
These practices create clarity, security, and respect around the child’s body — forming the foundation for future self-protection and appropriate social behaviour.
AI Assistant’s Session Notes (Extract)
(Anonymised highlights)
- Parent concerned about frequent touching.
- Identified discomfort, not defiance, as the trigger.
- Sameena suggested salt water wash, underwear changes twice a day, calm redirection.
- Discussed impact of shame and secrecy on fixation.
- Recommended teaching privacy rules with closed doors.
- Parent reported improvement in comfort and reduction in behaviour.
How to Apply This at Home — 3 Practical Steps
Before interpreting behaviour, check for discomfort. Simple hygiene interventions often resolve the issue quickly.
Treat the behaviour as part of a developmental phase. Overreaction can lead to secrecy and fixation.
Build age-appropriate body privacy habits, and offer sensory alternatives like sand pillows or blankets to redirect gently.
Final Reflection
Sometimes what looks like “behaviour” is simply the body asking for help. When parents respond with care, clarity, and calm routines, they not only resolve the immediate issue but also build trust, awareness, and healthy privacy habits. Hygiene and body awareness are life skills — and they grow best through respect, not reprimand.
Thank you for being part of this quiet revolution.
The momentum is real. And it begins with you.
— Authored by Sameena Zaheer
Special Educator | 25+ Years of Experience